The Absolute Best Way to Cook Kale, According to So Many Tests

In Absolute Best Tests, Ella Quittner destroys the sanctity of her home kitchen in the name of the truth. She’s boiled dozens of eggs, mashed a concerning number of potatoes, and roasted more broccoli than she cares to recall. Today, she tackles kale.

In Absolute Best Tests, Ella Quittner destroys the sanctity of her home kitchen in the name of the truth. She's boiled dozens of eggs, mashed a concerning number of potatoes, and roasted more broccoli than she cares to recall. Today, she tackles kale.


Kale has lived a thousand lives.

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The Absolute Best Way to Make Peanut Butter

In Absolute Best Tests, Ella Quittner destroys the sanctity of her home kitchen in the name of the truth. She’s boiled dozens of eggs, mashed a concerning number of potatoes, and roasted more broccoli than she cares to recall. Today, she tackles peanut…

In Absolute Best Tests, Ella Quittner destroys the sanctity of her home kitchen in the name of the truth. She's boiled dozens of eggs, mashed a concerning number of potatoes, and roasted more broccoli than she cares to recall. Today, she tackles peanut butter.


This was the year the peanut peaked.

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The Absolute Best Way to Cook a Turkey Breast, According to So Many Tests

In Absolute Best Tests, Ella Quittner destroys the sanctity of her home kitchen in the name of the truth. She’s boiled dozens of eggs, mashed a concerning number of potatoes, and roasted more broccoli than she cares to recall. Today, she tackles turkey…

In Absolute Best Tests, Ella Quittner destroys the sanctity of her home kitchen in the name of the truth. She's boiled dozens of eggs, mashed a concerning number of potatoes, and roasted more broccoli than she cares to recall. Today, she tackles turkey breast.


There’s no less appealing cut of raw poultry than the turkey breast. If you don’t believe me, I invite you to stare one down for more than 30 seconds while ingesting a snack of any kind.

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The Absolute Best Way to Cook Chicken Thighs, According to So Many Tests

In Absolute Best Tests, Ella Quittner destroys the sanctity of her home kitchen in the name of the truth. She’s boiled dozens of eggs, mashed a concerning number of potatoes, and roasted more broccoli than she cares to recall. Today, she tackles chicke…

In Absolute Best Tests, Ella Quittner destroys the sanctity of her home kitchen in the name of the truth. She's boiled dozens of eggs, mashed a concerning number of potatoes, and roasted more broccoli than she cares to recall. Today, she tackles chicken thighs.


It was summer of 2013, hot and sticky in the city, and I’d just acquired 12 chicken thighs.

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The Absolute Best Way to Cook Broccoli, According to So Many Tests

In Absolute Best Tests, Ella Quittner destroys the sanctity of her home kitchen in the name of the truth. She’s boiled dozens of eggs, mashed a concerning number of potatoes, and seared more porterhouse steaks than she cares to recall. Today, she tackl…

In Absolute Best Tests, Ella Quittner destroys the sanctity of her home kitchen in the name of the truth. She's boiled dozens of eggs, mashed a concerning number of potatoes, and seared more porterhouse steaks than she cares to recall. Today, she tackles broccoli.


The year is approximately 25 B.C., and the world’s primordial broccoli is about to be presented to a human for possible consumption. “Aspetti!” hisses the emperor’s chef, his eyes wide as the tiny treelike structures make their way to the grand dining table of Domus Augusti. “Wait! Is there any way to make it look any less…limp? Or any more…green?” But it’s too late—the florets are already in motion. And the emperor, never one to mince words, takes a single bite before pronouncing it “fine but kinda boring,” thereby relegating it to side dish status, at best, for thousands of years.

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The Absolute Best Way to Cook Chickpeas, According to So Many Tests

Dried legumes have long eluded me. Don’t ask about the time I tried to boil bulk bin–black beans for nearly eight hours, until I gave up on using them for anything other than gravel.

But chickpeas are the exception. Creamy and tender, this versatile i…

Dried legumes have long eluded me. Don’t ask about the time I tried to boil bulk bin–black beans for nearly eight hours, until I gave up on using them for anything other than gravel.

But chickpeas are the exception. Creamy and tender, this versatile ingredient never disappoints, whether blended into hummus, simmered in chana masala, or crisped under the broiler and consumed at cocktail hour.

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The Absolute Best Way to Make Pesto, According to So Many Tests

In Absolute Best Tests, Ella Quittner destroys the sanctity of her home kitchen in the name of the truth. She’s boiled dozens of eggs, mashed a concerning number of potatoes, and seared more Porterhouse steaks than she cares to recall. Today, she tackl…

In Absolute Best Tests, Ella Quittner destroys the sanctity of her home kitchen in the name of the truth. She's boiled dozens of eggs, mashed a concerning number of potatoes, and seared more Porterhouse steaks than she cares to recall. Today, she tackles pesto.


Maurizio Valle makes a lot of pesto—about 100 batches each year, if he had to guess.

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The Absolute Best Way to Cook Salmon, According to So Many Tests

In Absolute Best Tests, Ella Quittner destroys the sanctity of her home kitchen in the name of the truth. She’s boiled dozens of eggs, mashed a concerning number of potatoes, and seared more Porterhouse steaks than she cares to recall. Today, she tackl…

In Absolute Best Tests, Ella Quittner destroys the sanctity of her home kitchen in the name of the truth. She's boiled dozens of eggs, mashed a concerning number of potatoes, and seared more Porterhouse steaks than she cares to recall. Today, she tackles salmon.


I did not grow up eating much fresh fish. My parents were exceptional cooks, but they mostly steered clear of the stuff—perhaps because they were raised in landlocked places, or because they learned to cook in the ’80s, when swordfish carpaccio reigned troublingly supreme. On the rare occasion my dad would fire up the broiler for, say, a hunk of halibut, my mom would run from the room with her pointer finger and thumb clamped firmly around her nostrils, throwing open all the windows as she retreated.

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The Absolute Best Way to Cook Pasta, According to Too Many Tests

Someone buy me a ruler, please.

Photo by Ella Quittner

In Absolute Best Tests, Ella Quittner destroys the sanctity of her home kitchen in the name of the trut…

Someone buy me a ruler, please. Photo by Ella Quittner

In Absolute Best Tests, Ella Quittner destroys the sanctity of her home kitchen in the name of the truth. She's boiled dozens of eggs, mashed a concerning number of potatoes, and seared more Porterhouse steaks than she cares to recall. Today, she tackles pasta.


Nobody likes limp, lifeless pasta.

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The Absolute Best Ways to Cook a Chicken Breast, According to 28 Tests

In Absolute Best Tests, Ella Quittner destroys the sanctity of her home kitchen in the name of the truth. She’s seared more Porterhouse steaks than she cares to recall, tasted enough stuffing for 10 Thanksgivings, and mashed so many potatoes she may ne…

In Absolute Best Tests, Ella Quittner destroys the sanctity of her home kitchen in the name of the truth. She's seared more Porterhouse steaks than she cares to recall, tasted enough stuffing for 10 Thanksgivings, and mashed so many potatoes she may never mash one again. Today, she tackles the chicken breast.


Boneless, skinless chicken breasts have a weird rap.

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