What Does Unicorn Flavor Actually Taste Like?

Tenth Helpings is a humor column from our culture critic, Ella Quittner.
I am a Child of the ‘Corn. I was born in 1991 in Long Island—not on, never on—and so I spent much of my youth perusing the Lisa Frank section of our local Rite Aid. Once every fe…

Tenth Helpings is a humor column from our culture critic, Ella Quittner.

I am a Child of the ‘Corn. I was born in 1991 in Long Island—not on, never on—and so I spent much of my youth perusing the Lisa Frank section of our local Rite Aid. Once every few months, I was permitted to buy a pack of stickers, with which I would decorate everything from the plastic-sheathed diary I toted around but rarely wrote in, to the wall of my bedroom closet.

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The (Cursed) Rise of Bedtime Stories for Adults

Sleep Smarts is your guide to shut-eye—with trusty tips, product recs, and new routines for a better night’s rest.

The best sleep of my life was thanks to a combination of fresh pajamas, jet lag, falling rain, and the background murmurings of Bravo…

Sleep Smarts is your guide to shut-eye—with trusty tips, product recs, and new routines for a better night’s rest.

The best sleep of my life was thanks to a combination of fresh pajamas, jet lag, falling rain, and the background murmurings of Bravo’s Below Deck, a reality television show about the interpersonal dynamics of a mostly dissatisfied megayacht crew. But what works for me is not, apparently, what works for the rest of you.

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My Weird Night in the World’s Biggest Potato Hotel

Tenth Helpings is a humor column from our culture critic, Ella Quittner, illustrated by Olivia de Recat.

I know a place where you can go to be alone. It’s got a roof over it, with a door that locks. There’s a bed and a sink and a kettle for coffee, …

Tenth Helpings is a humor column from our culture critic, Ella Quittner, illustrated by Olivia de Recat.


I know a place where you can go to be alone. It’s got a roof over it, with a door that locks. There’s a bed and a sink and a kettle for coffee, and from most angles, the land on which it sits is stunningly green, and stunningly flat. The packaged snacks are free and abundant, and there is a rabbit who hops around the property as if he hadn’t yet decided what he’d get up to that day. There is a cow named Dolly who will wander by, shooting you reproachful glances until you acquiesce and stick your hand beneath the dispenser that overflows with edible pellets. Her gratitude will make you blush. It is the place where I began and ended one of the weirdest nights of my life, and it is a six-ton potato, thirty minutes southeast of Boise, Idaho.

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Is Hard Coffee The Most Chaotic Drink on Record?

Tenth Helpings is a humor column from our culture critic, Ella Quittner, illustrated by Olivia de Recat.

“There is nothing in the world more helpless and irresponsible and depraved than a man in the depths of an ether binge.” —Hunter S. Thompson, wh…

Tenth Helpings is a humor column from our culture critic, Ella Quittner, illustrated by Olivia de Recat.


“There is nothing in the world more helpless and irresponsible and depraved than a man in the depths of an ether binge.” —Hunter S. Thompson, who died 13 years before the advent of canned hard coffee

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The Great Layer Cake Mystery of 2020

Tenth Helpings is a humor column from our culture critic, Ella Quittner, illustrated by Olivia de Recat.

The Beginnings: A Trail of Cake Crumbs
“Hit me with a Two,” I said, jogging into the kitchen, mask dangling off my face. Read More…

Tenth Helpings is a humor column from our culture critic, Ella Quittner, illustrated by Olivia de Recat.


The Beginnings: A Trail of Cake Crumbs

“Hit me with a Two,” I said, jogging into the kitchen, mask dangling off my face.

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Perfecting the Art of Breadfacing

Tenth Helpings is a monthly humor column from our food culture critic and Absolute Best Test-er, Ella Quittner, and illustrated by Olivia de Recat.

The idea behind a sensory deprivation tank is straightforward. Remove a person’s access to external s…

Tenth Helpings is a monthly humor column from our food culture critic and Absolute Best Test-er, Ella Quittner, and illustrated by Olivia de Recat.


The idea behind a sensory deprivation tank is straightforward. Remove a person’s access to external stimuli like noise and light so that they may achieve therapeutic relief. The idea behind submerging one’s eyes, nose, face, as well as parts of one’s neck and scalp into various loaves of bread isn’t quite as straightforward—but for some, produces comparable results.

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