Kristin Rosenau – FoodWatcher

Almond Sugar Cookies

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The holiday season is upon us—the ground is covered in snow, the tree is up, and the radio station in the car is set for classic holiday tunes. Last year around this time, my husband and I were anxiously awaiting the birth of our daughter who was born shortly before Christmas.

As soon as we returned home from the hospital, our family was there to exchange gifts and meet our newest addition. It is safe to say I had no holiday spirit while recovering from a c-section and adjusting to life with a newborn.

Perhaps to make up for last year, I am in particularly bright spirits this year. I am excited to create a new set of holiday traditions for my daughter to enjoy, even if she is too young to fully enjoy them right now.

Last weekend, we all bundled up and went out to pick our tree (which she slept through). She’s already found her gifts beneath the tree (and tried to eat the wrapping paper). We listen to our favorite Christmas songs delivered by the same animated piano-playing snowman I enjoyed when I was young (she tries to make it a duet by playing the piano too).

The tradition I am most looking forward to sharing with her is baking and decorating Christmas cookies. I grew up with the tradition and continued it on my own as I’ve grown older. While I was rolling and cutting out these Almond Sugar Cookies, she was beside me on the floor, playing with a mixing bowl and spatula.

I plan to decorate these cookies with her later in the season, coloring some yogurt so she can fingerpaint her own masterpieces.

The holiday season feels new with a little one crawling around, and I can’t wait to create memorable experiences for her childhood.

These Almond Sugar Cookies are a more flavorful take on the traditional cut-out cookies. Almond paste and almond extract are added to the dough, which give the cookie a deep nutty flavor. The dough is easy to roll and cut out, and bakes up smooth and flat to decorate. If you are looking for a sugar cookie with more flavor, add this cookie to your holiday line-up!

Almond Sugar Cookies

Yields 2-3 dozen, depending on size of the cookie

3/4 cup (170 grams) butter
1 cup (200 grams) granulated sugar
4 ounces (113 grams) almond paste
2 large eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/2 teaspoon almond extract
2 3/4 cups (330 grams) all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt

In a large mixing bowl, beat together the butter and sugar until light and fluffy, about 3-5 minutes. Beat in the almond paste. Add in the eggs one at a time, mixing well between each addition. Beat in the vanilla and almond extract. Mix in the flour, baking powder, and salt until well combined. Wrap the dough in plastic wrap and refrigerate for one hour to firm up the dough.

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (180 degrees C). Line baking sheets with parchment paper or a non-stick baking mat for best cookie removal.

Roll out the dough on a lightly floured surface to 1/4-inch thickness and cut out the cookies using cookie cutters (follow these tips for the best cookies). The dough that is not being handled should be kept refrigerated. Bake cookies for 6-8 minutes, depending on the size of the cookie. Cool completely on a cooling rack before frosting.

Pumpkin Streusel Coffee Cake

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Fall arrived with brilliant colors and cold temperatures. Now, the peak color of autumn has passed. There are more leaves on the ground than in the trees, and the word snow is frequently overheard in whispered conversation. Time, as has happened on so many occasions before, has gotten away from me again.

At the end of summer, I worried that I wasn’t engaging meaningfully in my own life. I was going through the motions, but I felt detached—from myself and from my family. With the start of another school year on the horizon (and finding a new work-life balance), I feared this situation would only worsen.

And it did, for awhile, because finding a new normal takes time.

However, I gradually began to find the active role in my own life by adjusting my priorities and learning to let things go. I started going to the gym at 5:30 am (which I never thought I was capable of) because it gave me the time I need for myself and more goofy baby time with N when I get home in the afternoons (which eases that mama guilt).

My house is a dirty, cluttered mess and I’m learning to be okay with that. Sometimes it really is more important to sit on the couch with my husband and watch a television show together than to make sure the dishes in the sink are washed or the laundry is done.

I am leaving my oven turned off in favor of enjoying the quiet everyday activities of life—a cup of coffee to start the weekend with my husband, an afternoon walk as a family on a crisp fall afternoon, and sore knees while I crawl around with N on the floor (while she reminds me what I still need to baby-proof—how do I have a mobile baby already?).

I don’t intend to paint a rosy picture here. There are still many days when my hopeful intentions come crashing down, but I am feeling better. After a difficult year of adjusting to my new identity as a mother, I am beginning to feel present again.

And though it may seem small, it is everything.

I made this Pumpkin Streusel Coffee Cake a few times over the last month, each time changing it slightly until I found my personal preference. I was looking for an easy way to give the cake texture without needing to pull out a mixing bowl to whip up a batch of frosting.

Inspired in part by these pumpkin streusel muffins, I quickly stirred together a cinnamon-scented streusel topping to top off the pumpkin sheet cake. This pumpkin cake recipe—generously spiced and heavy on the pumpkin—is my go-to during the autumn season and has been for many years.

While the powdered sugar glaze is optional, I do like the look it gives to the final coffee cake (and a little extra sweetness is just the icing on the cake, right?).

This Pumpkin Streusel Coffee Cake is easy to make and ideal for sharing. A sweet cinnamon streusel tops a moist pumpkin cake, adding texture to a classic flavor combination. With a powdered sugar glaze for appearance and extra sweetness, the cake is complete. Serve alongside a hot cup of coffee or a tall glass of milk.

Pumpkin Streusel Coffee Cake

Yields 9 x 13-inch cake

Pumpkin Cake
15 ounces (425 grams) pumpkin puree
4 large eggs
3/4 cup (177 mL) vegetable oil
1 cup (200 grams) brown sugar, packed
3/4 cup (150 grams) granulated sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
2 cups (250 grams) all-purpose flour
2 teaspoons baking powder
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 1/2 teaspoons pumpkin pie spice
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1 teaspoon salt

Streusel Topping
1/2 cup (100 grams) granulated sugar
1/2 cup (100 grams) brown sugar, packed
1 cup (120 grams) all-purpose flour
1 1/2 teaspoons ground cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon salt
6 tablespoons (85 grams) butter, melted

Glaze
1 cup (125 grams) powdered sugar
2 tablespoons milk

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (180 degrees C). Grease a 9 x 13-inch cake pan. Set aside.

For the pumpkin cake, beat together the pumpkin, eggs, oil, brown sugar, granulated sugar, and vanilla extract in a large mixing bowl until well blended. Stir in the flour, baking powder, baking soda, pumpkin pie spice, cinnamon, and salt until smooth and uniform in appearance. Pour into prepared baking pan and set aside.

For the streusel topping, stir together the granulated sugar, brown sugar, flour, cinnamon, salt, and melted butter in a small mixing bowl. Crumble the mixture evenly over the top of the pumpkin batter.

Bake for 30-35 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted into the center comes out clean. Allow cake to cool before glazing.

To prepare glaze, stir together the powdered sugar and milk until smooth. If the glaze is too thick, thin with a teaspoon or two of milk. Drizzle over the top of the cake. Allow glaze to set before cutting cake and serving.

Peach Almond Galette

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At the beginning of June, my husband and I sat down and made a '“summer bucket list.” We checked in with our modest list for the first time last night. With August right around the corner, we have crossed off only one of the items.

Time has been getting away from me lately, entire days seemingly disappearing into the void. The daily routine is both a blessing and a curse. It’s wonderful for keeping a 7 month old (and her exclusively pumping mama) on a happy schedule, but it leaves little room for spontaneity.

In many ways, it feels like I’m hitting autopilot and cruising through life without engaging meaningfully.

I’ve been thinking recently about how to feel more present in my own life. Breaking the cycle and changing habits may be difficult, but it is starting to feel increasingly more essential. While I cannot change the large building blocks of my day, I can change my behavior in the small moments.

In general, I want to move myself away from the culture of detached consumption and into a space of creation. I need to set down my phone, so I don’t have the option of mentally checking out whenever the day begins to feel tedious. The endless scrolling does not bring me happiness, but it is so difficult to avoid.

Instead, I want to go for more walks with Baby N, cook recipes with seasonal vegetables, and bake a great loaf of sourdough bread with my new starter. I want to read more books and watch less television, spend mornings in the garden, and find ways to get out of the house and go on adventures with N (even if it is just to run a few errands). I want to build time into the day for myself and myself alone.

Wish me luck—change may be hard, but it is easier knowing it will make me a happier, more engaged mother in the end.

To me, it is simply not summer without a galette (as noted here, here, and here). These rustic cousins to pie are by far easier to pull together and feature the best of the ripe, seasonal fruit that summer has to offer.

I made this Peach Almond Galette three times in the last couple weeks for various events. I simply cannot get enough of this dessert. This galette stands out because of the addition of a thin layer of almond paste beneath the fresh peaches. The rich nutty flavor elevates the galette into a true pastry.

This is truly summer on a plate.

This Peach Almond Galette pairs fresh, ripe peaches with the rich, nutty flavor of almond. The galette comes together by layering almond paste between peaches and pie crust in a freeform dessert. With a sprinkling of sliced almonds and raw sugar before baking, the crust takes on the flavor of sweet, toasted almonds. While serving with a topping of whipped cream or side of vanilla ice cream would not be amiss, I prefer my slices unadorned and straight from the refrigerator. Enjoy whichever way your taste buds guide you.

Peach Almond Galette

Yields 6-8 servings, depending on size

6-7 medium sized peaches, peeled, pitted, and sliced
2 tablespoons all-purpose flour
3 tablespoons granulated sugar*
4 ounces (113 grams) almond paste
Recipe for single crust pie dough, chilled
Egg wash (1 large egg + 1 tablespoon water, whisked)
1/4 cup (22 grams) sliced almonds
2 tablespoons demerara or raw sugar, for sprinkling

In a medium bowl, fold together the sliced peaches, flour, and granulated sugar. Set aside.

On a lightly floured surface, roll out the pie dough into a circle roughly 1/8-inch thick and approximately 14 inches in diameter. Next, roll or flatten out the almond paste into a layer approximately 1/8-inch thick. Place the thin layer of almond paste in the center of the pie dough, leaving a 3-inch border around the outside.

Layer the peaches over the almond paste in a decorative fashion. Fold up the pie dough over the filling, pleating the dough every few inches. Brush the visible pie dough with egg wash and sprinkle the sliced almonds and demerara sugar evenly over the dough. Refrigerate for 20-30 minutes to firm up the pie dough.

Preheat oven to 375 degrees F (190 degrees C).

Bake for 50-60 minutes, or until the crust is golden and the peaches have released their juices. Cool slightly before serving. Serve with a topping of whipped cream or side of vanilla ice cream.

*Add more or less to taste, depending on the sweetness of the peaches.

Blueberry Thyme Scones

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With the summer growing season in full swing, my deck garden has taken off and is showcasing the color green in its many shades. While the vegetables are still in the early stages of growth, the herb garden has positively flourished, and I now have the happy problem of possessing more herbs than I (and my neighbors) know what to do with.

One of my favorite ways to enjoy herbs is through sweet preparations. The fruit and herb pairings are often unexpected, yet delicious. Basil pairs beautifully with blueberry—like in this Blueberry Basil Galette—and thyme makes a lovely complement to blueberries, plums, and pears alike.

For these scones, I started by rubbing fresh chopped thyme leaves into granulated sugar to bring out the flavor and oils. The key to using fresh herbs in baking is to use small amounts so that the dish is not overwhelmed. Thyme, in particular, can become bitter if used in large quantities, so it is better to err on the side of less than more.

While the blueberries are responsible for nearly all of the sweetness inside these scones, I like to drizzle the tops with a vanilla glaze to push the sweetness to my ideal level. The thyme brings a depth of flavor that lingers at the end—enough to add something unique without becoming overwhelming.

If you are also dealing with a particularly prolific herb garden, I hope you look for new ways to put the herbs to use in both savory and sweet preparations. The combinations can be suprising and satisfying.

These Blueberry Thyme Scones are a sweet way to start the day. A traditional blueberry scone is made unique with the addition of fresh thyme, which lends an earthy blend of lemon and mint tones. I prefer my scones extra sweet so I sprinkle the scones with raw sugar before baking. Once they emerge from the oven, I drizzle them with a vanilla glaze, but you can adjust the level of sweetness for your preference.

Blueberry Thyme Scones

Yields 6-8 servings

Blueberry Thyme Scone
2 tablespoons granulated sugar
2 teaspoons fresh thyme leaves, finely chopped
2 cups (240 grams) all-purpose flour
1 tablespoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
8 tablespoons (113 grams) cold unsalted butter, cubed
1 large egg
1 teaspoon vanilla
1/2 cup (120 mL) heavy cream, plus extra for brushing
6 ounces (170 grams) fresh blueberries
1 tablespoon raw or demerara sugar (optional)

Vanilla Glaze (optional)
1 cup (113 grams) powdered sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 tablespoon heavy cream

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (180 degrees C).

For the scones, in a large mixing bowl, rub together the granulated sugar and finely chopped thyme between your fingers until fragrant. Add the flour, baking powder, and salt, whisking together until smooth. Add the cubed butter and rub between your fingers until the dough resembles coarse sand with a few larger pieces remaining. Set aside.

In a small bowl, whisk together the egg, vanilla, and heavy cream. Pour over the scone batter. Add the blueberries and lightly mix until the dough comes together. The dough will be somewhat sticky.

Place the dough on a lightly floured surface. With floured hands, form the dough into a circle. You may need to fold the dough to evenly distribute the moisture, but no more than a few times to avoid overworking the dough, which will keep the scones tender. Flatten the dough until it is about 1-inch thick. Using a sharp knife, cut 6-8 equal pie-shaped wedges. Transfer scones to a baking sheet using a flat spatula and brush the tops of the scones with heavy cream. Sprinkle tops with raw sugar, if desired. Bake for 25-30 minutes, or until lightly browned.

For the glaze, in a small bowl, whisk together the powdered sugar, vanilla, and heavy cream until smooth. If glaze is too thick, add heavy cream 1 teaspoon at a time until glaze is thick, but still runs.

Lightly drizzle glaze over scones. Allow glaze to set before serving.

Rhubarb Almond Bars

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Last summer, I built a trio of large, self-watering cedar planters to start a deck garden. Our home is blessed with a large deck and, since the main living space overlooks the deck, I wanted to give it a little more life. Although we have plenty of yard space for a garden, we also have many critters (and deer) visiting frequently so it made more sense to elevate the garden to keep the plants safe from late night nibblers.

Each planter is 2 ft. by 6 ft., which leaves plenty of room for experimentation.

My interest in gardening is relatively new, but this hobby has quickly turned me into an enthusiastic plant lady. After killing every houseplant I attempted to grow up for many years, I was astonished when my black thumb seemingly turned green after moving into our house.

Apparently the trick for a green thumb is simply having large southeast facing windows—who knew?

Unfortunately, the first attempt at gardening in the outdoor planters was not very successful. In my eagerness to grow my own vegetables, I overplanted the space and didn’t do enough research on how to individually care for each plant. In addition, because the planters are self-watering (through a process of diffusion and soil osmosis), the plants with deep root systems ended up with root rot by midsummer.

By summer’s end, the only “successful” plants were the bell peppers (which grew only one picture perfect pepper each), the green beans, and the herb garden. Everything else—the tomatoes, cabbages, cucumbers, etc.—ended up producing very little or finally completing their slow death.

While the self-watering feature was definitely a curse, I only needed to water the plants once the entire season, so my laziness is more than willing to find a way to work within these constraints.

This year I am taking the failures of the previous summer and using them to (hopefully) do better this time around. To start, I did a little more planning and left more space for the plants to expand. Only plants with shallow root systems are allowed (peppers, onions, shallots, lettuce, carrots, herbs, green beans, flowers); the plants with larger root systems have been relegated to individual, well-draining containers (tomatoes).

I have my fingers crossed for now, but it will be another month or two before I’ll be able to label it a success or failure. Stay tuned.

I have plans to do a little landscaping and put in a rhubarb plant later this summer, but it will still be a couple years before we can harvest. Until then, the farmer’s market has everything I need.

I originally planned to make a strawberry rhubarb dessert, but I didn’t get around to baking until after the strawberries were past their prime. This recipe is all the better for it, because it allows the rhubarb flavor to truly shine. Paired with an almond oatmeal crust, these rhubarb-filled bars are a new way to enjoy this spring vegetable.

This recipe for Rhubarb Almond Bars is an easy way to use and enjoy rhubarb. Almonds and oatmeal come together to form the base of the bars. Sliced raw rhubarb is added to the center (no cooking required!) before the bars are topped with the remaining crust and placed in the oven to bake. The nutty almond flavor compliments the tart rhubarb well. Cut into squares and serve warm, cold, or room temperature.

Rhubarb Almond Bars

Yields 16 servings (or 8 x 8-inch pan)

Almond Bars
6 tablespoons (100 grams) butter, room temperature
3/4 cup (150 grams) brown sugar, packed
1 large egg
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 teaspoon almond extract
1 1/2 cups (150 grams) old-fashioned oats
1 cup (120 grams) all-purpose flour
1/2 cup (45 grams) sliced almonds
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt

Rhubarb Filling
3 cups (~14 ounces or 400 grams) fresh rhubarb, cut into 1/4-inch slices
1/4 cup (50 grams) granulated sugar
2 tablespoons cornstarch

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (180 degrees C). Lightly grease an 8 x 8-inch pan.

For the almond base, beat together the butter and brown sugar in a large mixing bowl until uniform. Beat in the egg, vanilla, and almond extract, mixing until blended. Stir in the oats, flour, sliced almonds, baking soda, and salt. The batter will be slightly sticky. Using greased hands, press 2/3 of the batter into the bottom of the prepared pan. Set aside remaining batter.

For the rhubarb filling, stir together the sliced rhubarb, sugar, and cornstarch.

Spread the rhubarb filling over the top of the almond base. Crumble the remaining batter evenly on top. Bake for 40-45 minutes, or until lightly browned. Allow to cool slightly in pan before serving.

Banana Snacking Cake

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Lately, I find myself gravitating towards familiar foods in my kitchen. The meals and desserts that I’ve enjoyed since childhood are on rotation—grilled cheese and tomato soup, spaghetti made with sauce from a jar, and chocolate chip cookies. It feels easier, in these final chaotic days of the school year, to reach for recipes that I know both forwards and backwards.

While there are no moments of surprise with new flavors or textures, the comfort of these routine meals is indulgent in a different way, for both body and soul.

This banana cake is one that I remember fondly from my childhood. Whenever the bananas were forgotten on the counter long enough to blacken, the mixing bowls would come out and this cake would emerge from the oven. The aroma of banana filling the air was the cue for the rest of my family to flock to the kitchen, stealing a bite or two before the cake had properly cooled.

It has been many years since I’ve last eaten this cake. Perhaps having my own little one in the house is causing these food memories to stir up, but, regardless of the reason, I am delighted to revisit this recipe.

This banana cake is a simple, unpretentious snacking cake—however, that doesn't mean this cake isn't something worth talking about.

The texture is my favorite part of this cake. As with most banana breads and cake, the final product has a bit of heft, but I think it works in the cake’s favor instead of against it. The chocolate glaze is also made with butter instead of heavy cream like a traditional ganache, which lends itself to a more intense buttery, chocolate flavor.

All these years later, my family is still in debate about the best way to eat this cake. My dad and I prefer to eat this cake chilled. The cold brings out a heaviness to the cake we both love, and the chocolate glaze becomes stiff making it literally melt in your mouth. My sister, on the other hand, prefers the cake slightly warmed, which yields a lighter feel to the cake and turns the chocolate glaze silky smooth. Though our debate may never be settled, the truth is that this cake is delicious any way you choose to serve it.

Since it is my belief that snacking cakes should be easy to prepare, instead of making a chocolate glaze, you could simply add chocolate chips to the batter to bring in the chocolate flavor without needing to use more pans. The choice, as always, is yours.

This Banana Snacking Cake combines the classic flavors of chocolate and banana. The addition of mashed banana to the cake lends a moistness, while a touch of cinnamon brings out a greater depth of flavor. The chocolate glaze is simple to make, melting together only chocolate and butter, but I could eat it by the spoonful (and I usually do). The glaze spreads smooth when slightly warm and holds its shape like a dream. This cake is a good option to reach for when you are looking for a sweet snack and, if your kitchen is anything like mine, it will disappear before you are ready to see it go.

Banana Snacking Cake

Yields 9 x 13-inch cake

Banana Cake
2 1/2 cups (300 grams) all-purpose flour
1 tablespoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup (113 grams) unsalted butter, room temperature
1/2 cup (100 grams) granulated sugar
3/4 cup (150 grams) brown sugar, packed
2 large eggs
3 medium ripe bananas, mashed
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
3/4 cup (180 mL) buttermilk (or regular milk)

Chocolate Glaze
6 ounces (170 grams) semi-sweet chocolate, coarsely chopped
1/2 cup (113 grams) butter, cubed

Preheat oven to 325 degrees F (160 degrees C). Grease a 9 x 13-inch baking pan.

To prepare the banana cake, whisk together flour, baking powder, cinnamon, and salt in a medium bowl. Set aside.

In a large mixing bowl, cream together the butter and sugars until light and fluffy. Add the eggs one at a time, beating well after each addition. Mix in the mashed bananas and vanilla extract.

Beat in the flour mixture and buttermilk in alternating additions, starting and ending with the flour. Pour batter evenly in the prepared baking pan and bake for 35-40 minutes, or until golden and a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean. Allow the cake cool completely.

To prepare the chocolate glaze, melt together the chopped chocolate and cubed butter in a small saucepan over low heat until smooth and uniform. Spread evenly over the cooled cake and allow the glaze to set before cutting and serving the cake.

Lemon Almond Cake

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The fog of early parenthood has finally lifted. I have emerged stronger—with a bigger heart, immeasurable patience, and the ability to function on limited sleep. I am starting to feel like myself again and it feels good.

I lost myself in those first few months, as I imagine happens often with new parents. With the newborn routine of eat-change-sleep on repeat every three hours, I felt like a shell of my former self. There wasn’t time to explore interests or hobbies—there was hardly time to sneak in a shower.

To survive, I followed the mantra “one task a day.” Some days the only thing I accomplished was making dinner; other days it was making it to mama/baby yoga class so I could start the process of making my body feel like my own again. These small daily goals fueled me without overwhelming me.

It was the only balance I could seem to manage.

Even though I enjoyed my time at home with sweet Baby N, I credit the act of going back to work with helping me reclaim my individuality. It’s true that I am a parent now, but that is not the only attribute that defines me. I welcome the daily challenges of being a high school teacher because my students remind me of the other aspects of myself that I appreciate (plus, the knowledge that summer break is around the corner eases the transition of being away from N during the day).

Although I’ve started to realize how important it is for me to have time for myself, I still very much struggle with allowing that dedicated time. Although the days feel long, the hours are short and time seems to evaporate into the ether. The great irony of parenthood is the knowledge that I could be more present for my daughter if I spend time away to recharge myself.

This balance between a parent and an individual with my own needs and desires will be a work in progress, but the journey is helping me understand myself on a new level, which I recognize is a gift in itself.

Lemon and almond is one of my favorite flavor combinations in spring. The sharpness of lemon and the nutty warmth of almond add both warmth and a wake up call to a palate that has been saturated in the comfort of winter. Taking advantage of a day off from school and Baby N’s napping schedule, I spent some much needed time in the kitchen. It wasn’t until I had finished the photographs that I realized this cake felt—and looked—remarkably familiar.

Perhaps unsurprisingly, after an exploration into the recipe archive, I noticed this lemon almond cake was quite similar to a lemon cake I had made the year prior (down to the exact date!). Mom brain, anyone?

I like to believe these resemblances work in my favor—this cake is so good, I unknowingly created a recipe for it twice. Perhaps that is all the encouragement you’ll need to turn on the oven, zest a couple lemons, and start baking.

This Lemon Almond Cake brings together the warmth of almond with the spiritedness of lemon. The cake batter is infused with both lemon zest and lemon oil to give it a bright lemon flavor, and almond extract and almond flour to round out a nutty undertone. Once baked, the cake is brushed with a lemon glaze on the outer edges to give the cake additional flavor and to seal in the cake's moisture. This cake is perfect to serve plain and unadorned—the flavors are so vivid, it needs nothing else to feel complete.

Lemon Almond Cake

Yields 12 servings

Lemon Almond Cake
1 1/2 cups (300 grams) granulated sugar
Zest of 2 lemons
3/4 cup (180 mL) vegetable oil
4 large eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 teaspoon almond extract
1 teaspoon lemon oil (optional)
1 teaspoon salt
2 teaspoons baking powder
2 1/4 cups (270 grams) all-purpose flour
3/4 cup (75 grams) almond flour
1 cup (250 mL) milk

Lemon Glaze
1/2 cup (100 grams) granulated sugar
Juice of 2 lemons

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (180 degrees C). Heavily grease and flour a 10-cup Bundt pan. Set aside.

For the lemon cake, place the granulated sugar and lemon zest in a large mixing bowl. Rub the sugar and zest together until fragrant. Whisk in the vegetable oil, eggs, vanilla extract, almond extract, lemon oil, salt, and baking powder. Alternate adding the flours and milk, stirring after each addition, until the batter is smooth and uniform in appearance.

Pour batter into the prepared baking pan and bake for 45-55 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted into the center comes out clean. Allow cake to cool in pan for 15 minutes before unmolding.

While the cake is baking, prepare the glaze by heating the granulated sugar and lemon juice in a small saucepan until the sugar dissolves. Set aside.

Place the cake on a cooling rack and brush the glaze over the cake, giving time for the glaze to absorb between layers. Allow the cake to cool completely and the glaze to set before cutting and serving.

Banana Oat Bread

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In the last few weeks of pregnancy with Baby N, one of my goals was to fill the deep freeze with meals for after baby arrived. I hoped having a stash of easy-to-prepare meals would make the recovery and transition to motherhood smoother.

After haphazardly throwing together an ingredient list (and making a memorable trip to the grocery store with a very full shopping cart), I spent most of a Saturday in the kitchen prepping meals. Ingredients were tossed into freezer bags to create over a dozen crockpot meals. A soup pot filled with oatmeal boiled away on the stove. The oven ran at a steady 350 degrees for hours. My husband dutifully chopped ten large onions by hand, doing his best to fend off the tears.

It was a production.

With a newly filled freezer, I collapsed on the couch, exhausted but pleased to cross another item off the pre-baby to-do list.

Ironically, a full three and a half months into parenthood, the deep freeze is still full of freezer meals. Although the breakfast sandwiches and oatmeal disappeared quickly, the rest of the thoughtfully prepared meals continue to wait their turn.

Although we hadn’t anticipated it, the act of cooking dinner each evening helped to keep us grounded. In our new role as parents—where everything felt new and unknown—we enjoyed the familiar routine of turning on the stove and cooking simple meals.

It was a way to connect our new lives with the old, as we evolved from a family of two into a family of three.

Lately, however, there is increasingly less space for the frozen meals as the freezer space is steadily being replaced with bags of breastmilk. It’s time to start enjoying the fruits of our labor.

While reorganizing the freezer last weekend, I was delighted to find a hidden loaf of this Banana Oat Bread buried beneath a bag of Italian chicken and a marinated pork shoulder. Needless to say, it disappeared quickly (nursing hunger is real). Unfortunately for me, there are no more loaves hiding away (I double checked), so I’ll have to bake up another one to take its place.

With my free time for baking being limited since going back to work, it would be nice to have a reason to spend an afternoon in the kitchen again. My husband already said he’d take the baby for an afternoon so long as he gets a slice warm from the oven.

I think that’s a fair trade, don’t you?

This Banana Oat Bread is simple in construction and customizable to your taste, The bread itself is subtly sweetened with maple syrup, which allows the banana flavor to shine. The addition of oats adds a comforting flavor to the loaf. My preference is to add chocolate chips and chopped walnuts to my loaves, but you can choose your own mix-ins (or forego them completely). While I like to toast each slice and slather it with butter, the bread is equally delicious served at room temperature straight from the pan.

Banana Oat Bread

Yields 5 x 9-inch loaf

4 large ripe bananas, mashed (about 2 cups or 450 grams)
1/2 cup (156 grams) pure maple syrup
1/2 cup (100 grams) vegetable oil
2 large eggs
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon ground nutmeg
1 teaspoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 1/3 cups (160 grams) all-purpose flour
1 cup (80 grams) old fashioned oats
1 cup (113 grams) chopped walnuts (optional)
2/3 cup (113 grams) chocolate chips (optional)
1 tablespoon raw or demerara sugar, for topping (optional)

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (180 degrees C). Grease a 5 x 9-inch loaf pan. Set aside.

In a large mixing bowl, whisk together mashed bananas, maple syrup, vegetable oil, eggs, and vanilla extract until uniform. Whisk in the cinnamon, nutmeg, baking powder, baking soda, and salt. Gradually stir in the flour and oats. Fold in the chopped walnuts and chocolate chips. Set aside.

Pour batter into prepared pan and smooth until level. Sprinkle raw sugar evenly over the top. Bake for 55-65 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean. Cool in pan for 10 minutes before removing and placing on a cooling rack to cool completely.

Blueberry Crumble Doughnuts

…

After two months, I finally feel like I am settling into motherhood. In the foggy haze of these early days, it simultaneously feels like I have been a parent forever and for no time at all. The transition into motherhood was unexpectedly difficult for me. Since I have wanted to be a mother since I was a young child, I anticipated that the transition would be natural and instinctual. It never occurred to me that I may feel otherwise.

While not all women feel the same, I loved pregnancy. I enjoyed watching my body change, feeling the baby’s kicks and movements, and experiencing the joy of carrying a child. It helped, of course, that my pregnancy was virtually symptom-free—as far as I was concerned, there weren’t any aspects not to love.

When we found out our daughter was growth restricted and would therefore be arriving a few weeks earlier than anticipated, my heart grew heavy. I wasn’t ready for my pregnancy to be over, for this part of the journey my baby and I embarked on to come to a close. I wanted to stay pregnant forever. My body didn’t feel ready to give birth; I wasn’t yet ready to meet my daughter.

I told my husband that I needed more time. If I could somehow be pregnant longer, maybe I would find the emotional and physical connection I needed to say goodbye to my deeply loved pregnancy and welcome a new beginning with the birth of our daughter.

When the big day arrived, I went into the hospital conflicted. Even with more time, I hadn’t been able to shift my unwanted emotions. Yet, I still felt hopeful. After reading so many stories of mothers feeling an instant deep love for their children during birth, I anticipated that these feelings would overtake me when the moment arrived.

During the C-section—when the doctors lifted my daughter over the curtain and I laid eyes on her for the first time—I felt taken aback. While I had no idea what she would look like, her actual appearance took me completely by surprise. The birth experience was shocking to me in a way I did not expect.

When they handed her to me for the first time minutes later, she felt like someone else’s baby. I felt detached and confused. Where was the instant love and connection I was supposed to feel? What kind of mother was I going to be if this is how I felt in these early moments?

I didn’t learn this until later, but over 40% of women do not bond with their babies right away. Even though my husband and I took childbirth education and early parenthood classes, our instructors did not touch on this subject. I wish I had been told my feelings were normal, that parenthood is an enormous adjustment and that sometimes it takes time for emotions to sort themselves out. Instead, I felt like I was somehow failing at this job I just began.

The next couple weeks were rough for me. I had a difficult recovery due to the C-section and resulting complications. I struggled to do the most basic of tasks, unable to sit upright or walk without enormous amounts of pain. Breastfeeding was not going well. Since Baby N was born early and weighed so little, it was vital for her to get the calories she needed to grow, but she also didn’t have the energy necessary to feed. I had to deal with the reality that I would not be able to provide milk for my daughter in the way I had planned.

The postpartum hormones hit me harder than I anticipated. I couldn’t even think about my pregnancy without bursting into tears. I was grieving the loss of being pregnant, of my life before having a child. Even though I’ve wanted to be a mother as long as I can remember (I was ecstatic when I found out I was pregnant), I was dealing with unexpected feelings of remorse—and then guilt that I could ever have these emotions at all. Exhaustion and sleep deprivation only intensified everything I was experiencing.

Life with a newborn is hard.

It was several weeks before I found myself in a better place, before I was able to fully bond with and enjoy time with my daughter. Now, of course, I can’t imagine life without her—her big smiles, goofy mannerisms, and love for sleepy snuggles.

My transition into motherhood was not beautiful or graceful. It has taken time for me to accept that reality doesn’t always match expectations and that’s okay. I expect I will learn this lesson over and over again in my new role as a parent.

Right now, the fog of early parenthood has not completely dissipated, but it is starting to lift. I am still working on finding my new identity both in and out of parenthood. One lesson I have taken away from the transition to motherhood is to have grace with myself.

One day at a time. Everything will eventually fall into place—it always does.

Blueberry Crumble Doughnuts feature a baked, cake-based doughnut. To prepare, blueberries are folded into a vanilla-scented batter. A cinnamon crumble is sprinkled over the top before baking. For best texture, these doughnuts should be enjoyed the same day they are baked, but I still savored the leftovers a day or two later.

Blueberry Crumble Doughnuts

Yields 6-8 doughnuts

Blueberry Doughnuts
1/3 cup (70 grams) granulated sugar
2 tablespoons vegetable oil
1 large egg
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 1/4 cups (150 grams) all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup (120 mL) milk
4 ounces (113 grams) fresh or frozen blueberries

Crumble Topping
2 tablespoons butter, room temperature
1/4 cup (50 grams) granulated sugar
1/2 cup (60 grams) all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (180 degrees C). Grease a standard-size doughnut pan.

In a large mixing bowl, whisk together the sugar, vegetable oil, egg, and vanilla. Stir in the flour, baking powder, and salt. Stir in the milk until uniform. Fold in the blueberries.

Transfer the batter to a pastry bag (or large resealable plastic kitchen bag with the corner snipped off). Fill the depressions in the prepared pan with the batter until 2/3 full (alternatively, you could spread the batter into the pan using an offset spatula, but this results in more unevenly shaped doughnuts).

For the crumble topping, beat together butter and sugar until well combined. Stir in flour and cinnamonuntil crumbly. Crumble the topping evenly over the batter. Bake for 18-24 minutes, or until crumble topping browns and a toothpick inserted into the center comes out clean. Cool in pan for 15-20 minutes before transferring to a cooling rack to cool completely.

Oh, Baby!

…

My husband and I welcomed our sweet baby girl into the world before the end of 2018! Baby N has completely captured our hearts, and it is already hard to imagine life before her. It has been amazing watching her grow over the last six weeks—each day she is changing and learning new things about the world around her.

Like most birth stories, Baby N’s story is one I could not have predicted. I had an incredibly easy pregnancy. Besides some typical lower back pain, I had no other symptoms except for the growing baby bump—no morning sickness, food cravings, or exhaustion. I feel especially fortunate for this outcome because this pregnancy was considered high risk from the beginning, so Baby N and I were watched particularly closely over our nine months together.

As the weeks passed, we learned that N was going to be a smaller baby. Each ultrasound showed her overall growth percentile decreasing, but her size wasn’t going to become a concern unless she dropped below the tenth percentile. We also learned that N was breech, with her butt down and her head and feet comfortably tucked up under my left ribcage.

While it is possible for babies to flip into the correct position before birth, it becomes less likely in the latter weeks of pregnancy. Even though I didn’t really believe the old wives’ tales on how to flip a breech baby, I spent many evenings positioned upside down anyway, with a bag of frozen blueberries above my bump trying to coax her to flip around to avoid the chill. This method was wildly unsuccessful, along with half a dozen others I tried. Baby N was comfortable and would not be moved.

During our 34 week appointment, N dropped to the eighth percentile and was subsequently diagnosed with intrauterine growth restriction (IUGR). The doctors believed this was due to increased resistance to blood flow through the placenta. We were cautioned that it is possible for the resistance to become so great that the blood flow can reverse direction, which is a very serious situation that calls for an emergency C-section to preserve the health of the baby.

This news hit us especially hard—baby N wasn’t due for another six weeks! Along with weekly appointments to closely monitor her health, we were told to pack and bring our hospital bags to the rest of our visits, just in case.

The reality that we could have a baby in a single week’s time was very overwhelming for me, especially since I assumed I would have several more weeks to prepare everything for her arrival. I spent the next week making lists of each task that needed to get done and frantically tried to get everything in order, both at work and at home.

I hoped that Baby N would be allowed to stay snuggled up under my ribcage a little longer. I still felt blindsided by the news and wasn’t ready for the pregnancy to end. I needed more time to enjoy her kicks and soak up my last few days as a non-parent.

Fortunately, my wish was granted. At our 35 week appointment, we learned the resistance was unexpectedly measuring less than it had before. At 36 weeks, the resistance was measuring completely normal, which no one (including the doctors) had anticipated. However, because N was still measuring so small for her age, the doctors believed she would do better outside of the womb. Our induction date was set for 37 weeks exactly. Baby N was going to be an early (full) term baby.

Since N was still breech, I opted to try an external cephalic version (ECV), in which the doctor manually tries to turn the baby into the correct position for birth. After two failed attempts (where Baby N refused to budge even an inch), she was born via C-section shortly thereafter.

Our little peanut was in perfect health, weighing in at a smidge over 5 pounds with a head full of fuzzy hair.

After spending a few nights in the hospital, we were able to return home in time for a quiet holiday. While the shift to parenthood was a huge adjustment, I’ve enjoyed getting to know and learn all about this little peanut. She loves to stretch for minutes at a time when she is unswaddled, clothes are her worst enemy, and her endless goofy expressions make me laugh. Who knew that simple things, like N discovering her tongue, would bring such joy? In the last couple weeks, she’s graduated to newborn sizes, and we discovered she loves to “dance” to music as she lays on the floor and kicks her legs.

Over the last six weeks, I’ve given myself a leave from the blog and social media to spend much needed quality time with Baby N. Parenthood is certainly going to be a balance, but I’m ready to start devoting more time to myself and get back to doing the things that I enjoy—like baking and sharing it with you.